Tips that Actually Work: Boosting Self-Esteem
Hey there! If you've clicked on this blog, you might be feeling a little down about yourself. Maybe you’re struggling with confidence, or perhaps self-esteem is hiding in the corner like a shy kitten. Don’t worry, you’re in good company. We all have those moments (or days, or months…) when we feel like we’re just not good enough. But here's the good news: self-esteem and confidence are like muscles—you can build them up with a bit of effort and practice. So, let’s get into it!
1. Talk to Yourself Like You Would a Friend
Would you ever tell your best friend they’re a total failure for spilling coffee on their shirt? Of course not! You’d probably laugh, help them clean up, and remind them that everyone has clumsy moments. So why do we beat ourselves up over small mistakes? Start practicing self-compassion by speaking to yourself kindly. When you mess up, treat yourself with the same understanding and patience you’d offer to a friend.
Explore self-compassion exercises here.
2. Celebrate the Small Wins
Did you get out of bed today? That’s a win. Did you manage to put on pants? Double win! Celebrate these small victories because they add up. Keeping a daily journal where you jot down these achievements can be a game-changer. It’s like creating your own personal highlight reel to remind you just how awesome you are, even on the tough days.
3. Ditch the Comparison Game
Scrolling through Instagram and seeing everyone’s picture-perfect lives can feel like a punch to the gut. Remember, social media is everyone’s highlight reel—not their blooper reel. Comparing your behind-the-scenes to someone else’s best moments is unfair. Focus on your journey, and remember that everyone has their own struggles, even if they don’t post about them.
Learn more about challenging negative thoughts here.
4. Get Moving
Exercise is a fantastic way to boost your mood and self-esteem. You don’t need to run a marathon—unless that’s your thing, in which case, you’re amazing. A simple walk around the block, a dance session in your living room, or even some gentle yoga can release those feel-good endorphins and remind you of what your body is capable of.
5. Learn Something New
Picking up a new skill can do wonders for your confidence. Always wanted to learn how to cook? Try a new recipe (just make sure you have a fire extinguisher handy if you’re anything like me). Interested in painting? Grab some supplies and get creative. The process of learning and improving can give you a sense of accomplishment and boost your self-esteem.
6. Surround Yourself with Positive Vibes
You know that friend who always has a way of making you feel like a superhero? Spend more time with them. The people we hang out with can have a huge impact on our self-esteem. Surround yourself with those who uplift and support you, and distance yourself from those who bring negativity.
Read more about the importance of social support here.
7. Practice Gratitude
It might sound cheesy, but gratitude can be incredibly powerful. Each day, take a moment to think about a few things you’re grateful for. They don’t have to be monumental—maybe it’s the fact that the sun came out today, or that you had your favorite breakfast. This practice can shift your focus from what’s lacking to what’s abundant in your life.
8. Face Your Fears
Sometimes, building confidence means stepping out of your comfort zone. Is there something you’ve been avoiding because it scares you? Start small. If public speaking terrifies you, try talking in front of a mirror or to a small group of friends. Each step you take outside your comfort zone makes you stronger and more confident.
9. Self-Care is Key
Taking care of yourself isn’t just about bubble baths and face masks (though those are great too). It’s about ensuring you’re getting enough sleep, eating nutritious foods, and taking time to relax and unwind. When you treat your body and mind with care, you’re sending a message to yourself that you’re worth it.
Learn more about the importance of self-care and taking mental heath days here.
10. Seek Help When Needed
Sometimes, building self-esteem and confidence requires a little extra help. Talking to a therapist can provide you with the tools and support you need to work through deeper issues. There’s no shame in seeking help—in fact, it’s a brave and powerful step toward better mental health.
Improving your self-esteem and confidence is a journey, not a destination. Be patient with yourself, celebrate your progress, and remember that everyone has their ups and downs.
Remember, you’re not alone on this journey. If you ever need a helping hand or a listening ear, don’t hesitate to reach out. We’re all in this together, cheering each other on one small win at a time. Now go on, give yourself a high five—you deserve it!
You’ve got this. All my best,
Kendra Sievers
LCSW